Nap Time

As you can see this adorable Chinese boy is extremely tired after a long hard day at school and from eating probably. I completely understand this boy's life. Being in school for six or more hours, with no breaks can be extremely exhausting. Teachers get upset when students fall asleep during their class, well they wouldn't have this issue if teachers would allow students to have power naps. I declare that at 12:00 PM to 1:00 PM will be national nap time hour, everyday, and in every school. Each and every student will be supplied with fluffy rainbow pillows and cuddly blanket with puppies on them, and have the choice to listen to soft classically music. Then students won't be tired and cranky, and teachers will have an easier time with dealing with students. No doubt that nap time will decrease anger issues, depression, and suicide rates. I personally think this is my best idea yet! I know that all students of "Deannaville" will adore this idea and me. 

NO more Women Jokes

"That's what she said", "that's what he said", this is what I say, "no more women jokes." Men and women are created equally; well women are made slightly better. Women are individuals and should be treated as respectable humans; God did not make women to be little servants for men. Some men might say, "How many men does it take to open a beer? None, it should have been opened when she brought it." I don't like to hear these jokes, especially this classic joke, "How do you fix a woman's watch? You don't. There is a clock on the stove." 
I feel bad for my dear blonde friends, they have the hardest. People assume that all blondes are dumb and say mean things like this, "why did the blonde get excited after she finished a jigsaw puzzle in only 6 months, because the box said from 2 to 4 years." Yes, I understand that they are funny. I admit that I giggle when I hear a good blonde joke like this one, "why did the blonde tip toe near the medicine cabinet? Because she didn't want to wake up the sleeping pills." If I hear another women joke coming from a man's mouth, I will make him eat his words (off the dirty ground). Don't you dare mess with your ruler.            

Heroes

We have thousands of heroes already, firefighters, policemen, teachers, mailmen, etc., so why would we need more? We don't need more, we just need super, super heroes I mean. I want a firefighter to be able to run through a fire, jump off a building, and save lives without dying. I want all heroes to have the ability to save the day with super awesome super powers. I will have my team of mad scientists come up with a formula that, when proctored to humans, will make them super heroes. I will do this for all modern day heroes. There will no longer be fear when a firefighter is forced to go into a burning building, or a policeman has to face a crazy gun man. Not only will firefighters and policemen be vaccinated, but I, myself, will also have an extremely large dosage of this super vaccine. I will be the strongest, greatest, most amazing super human. I will have no weaknesses, and I will be invincible. There is no need to worry or prepare for my life to pass any longer, because not only will I never die, but I will, essentially, have any and all power. There will never be a reason for someone to take my place as ruler.  

65 and Fit

My dear elders, no one wants to see your saggy butt and arms at the beach. I declare that anyone that is over the age of 65 will have to have at least a four pack. I think this will improve people from getting post traumatic stress disorder from seeing an old person with wrinkles deeper than the Grand Canyon. This will help elders have more energy, an improved sleep experience,  stable weight, improve circulation, lower blood pressure, and delay ageing. Because of their improvement in appearance, we will have elder shows. We will rate them on how fit they are on a scale of one to eleven. The top scorers will be put in a game were they must battle to the death... I suspect that this will help keep the population rate from constantly increasing. I know that this seems far fetched, but that's because it is. So what if it's far fetched, I rule the world. The elders will thank me, and bow to me because I own them.....like the wrinkly slaves that they are. 

No more Tests

Students of "Deannaville", I bring you good news! I declared that ever school in "Deannaville" will not be allowed to give students any type of tests. (No math tests, English tests, gym tests, driving tests, and many others.) When I was a student many, many, many years ago, I would get so stressed and upset for tests that I would want to commit bloody murder to an innocent puppy. It is time for a change in the school system!!! I am tired of seeing students getting stressed over a ridiculous test, all the time they put into studying instead of hanging out with friends and family! Getting rid of tests would save schools a lot of money and time to teach students more important things. I know doing this would also will help the teachers tremendously and a super stress-reliever. If I hear anything about a teacher giving students tests, then I will forcefully send the teacher to the Sahara Desert where all the people that are infected with AIDS or HIV. I personally believe that if any teacher is giving a student a hard will be tortured by my Russian army. I do not mess around when it comes to education. 

Space Babies

I know for a fact that Earth will be the most dangerous place to live, with all the pollution and high population. There will be no more room on Earth for people to live. I have been thinking, how I'm ever going to make "Deannaville" a safer place to live. Well, I can't use a huge fan to blow the toxic  air out of our planet. Then I been thinking some more, and came up with a  genius plan to send people out of Earth to Mars! I will make Mars the most comfortable and livable place to live. There will be houses, food, water, and many other things that you need to survive. Kids will go to school as they did on Earth, adults will go to work normally, and everyone will be happier on Mars than Earth.  This is how it's going to happen, my worker will go to Mars  and build homes and everything that was on Earth will be in Mars. Do not worry about the oxygen problem, my teams of scientist from all over the world is working on this issue.  I trust that they will come up with a solution quickly, so I can get everyone up in Mars as soon as possible. For those that refuse to move to Mars will die on Earth. 

No more AIDS

Do you know how many people in the world has AIDS or HIV? Well, I have no idea, and I am too terrified to know. For those dummies that don't know what AIDS are or HIV, it's when a person's immune system is too weak to fight off infections. HIV can be spread through any type of unprotected sex if one of the partners has the virus. This can happen when body fluids such as semen, vaginal fluids, or blood from an infected person get into the body of someone who is not infected. Someone can become infected even if only tiny amounts of these fluids are spread. There is no cure for this disease, yet. I cannot have "Deannaville" full of people with AIDS and HIV.  My solution to stop the spread of AIDS it to send everyone that is infected to the wonderful and mysterious Sahara Desert in Africa. Why you may ask, because the Sahara Desert is the perfect environment where no one can survive. The purpose of this mission is to keep all the infected people in an area away from the "healthy" citizens of "Deannaville". This will stop the spread the of AIDS. If any infected people tired to escape the Sahara Desert, then my team of doctors  will inject them with a medication that will give them all the STDs that exist!